


Candles mean nothing when the light comes from you

by Coldfeetonthekitchenfloor



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Blood, Clexa, Death, F/F, I'm Sorry, Pain, Sad, The 100 - Freeform, clexakru - Freeform, in trying to get over these two, it's just not happening, lexa deserved better, light - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-29
Updated: 2016-07-29
Packaged: 2018-07-27 11:57:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7617154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coldfeetonthekitchenfloor/pseuds/Coldfeetonthekitchenfloor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's hard to feel light when even your blood is made from the shadows and a million candles cannot change that. That doesn't stop her from trying. </p><p>Maybe she should give them up for something else, she's never seen a shade of blonde that can light up a room like that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Candles mean nothing when the light comes from you

Death was never supposed to feel like this, it was never supposed to be easy. But maybe it was unavoidable this time, she'd evaded death for far too long, it was always going to catch her in the end.

The thing is, she was ready before and that's why it had waited, that's why it had crawled behind her in the shadows until the universe had changed her mind. And she wasn't ready yet, not now that people had fallen out of the sky, not now that she'd learnt the meaning of living. 

Love was not weakness, death was, and she doesn't want it anymore. She realises this as her heart beats out of rhythm, as her hands come to the hole shot through her middle, as her knees drop to the floor. Deaths hands come crawling around her shoulders where the commanders cape had hung for so long, not long enough.

And she feels the pain but she _doesn't_. Insides of a body are never meant to see the light, they're never meant to feel it. But as she's laid on her back, odd sounds that she swears she's not making falling from her lips, it's golden, the light that pours in through the gap in her skin and flesh. It's more warmth than she's felt before, blackened blood belongs in the shadows, in the dark, in the cold. Black blood belongs to reptiles not humans. How long has it been since she changed into one?

Her candles have nothing on this.

And soft hands are trying to stop the bleeding now, pushing it all back into her body with the light tangled inside the blood cells. And she wonders whether the people from the sky have blood that has felt the light before, maybe Clarke's skin is thinner than hers, maybe light through skin turns black blood red. Maybe this is what it feels like to have sunshine running through her veins. 

Her blood cannot be put back in, not now that it's felt rays of gold, not now that the shadows have caught up with her. And she still doesn't feel pain as her body jerks and her words stutter, what she does feel is regret and grief and sorrow. What she feels the most is love. Her insides are near molten now though and her lover presses more of it into her lips and down her throat and into her lungs. She wonders weather Clarke will be able to see it leaking back out when her heart gives up.

The moment the light spreads to her heart, she doesn't feel it and she guesses that something else had put light there already, _someone_ else. 

She looks into blue eyes as her body shudders once more, as her fizzing blood ceases to move any further around her body, choosing instead to leak out into deaths hands. 

And within her last heart beats she finds the sky, she finds leads to other lives, to other moments in which she doesn't die, in which death doesn't have a single hold on her, in which blue eyes always smile. 

There, she sends her heart as it jumps once more, pressing out its last beats in the form of a name, _Clarke, may we meet again._


End file.
